31 October 2014

These Taliban Guys Are Mailing it in

Remember Baghdad Bob? The Taliban ought to hire him, what with their information office in such an embarassing disarray. 

Jonah Goldberg quipped "if you’re going to go down in a blaze of glory, why be stingy with the kerosene?" A corollary could be, "if you're going to turn loose the obvious propaganda, why not try to make yourself look at least slightly more competent than an ISIS finishing school drop out?" 

Here is a recent example from "Voice of Jihad," or some such other ominously-named Twitter account that speaks for the Taliban. 
The Islamic Emirate mujahedeen is reporting from Char-Chano district of Uruzgan province that, this morning a resident of Langar village of Char-Chano district by the name of Ramatullah son of Naqubullah which was serving in Tarin Kot as soldier with commander Mirwas by the effort of our recruitment commission repainted hi mastics and joined the mujaheddin.
He brought one motorcycle with him.
Stop the presses!

Maybe this is totally accurate (though I can neither confirm nor deny that anyone was repainted with hi mastics). But if it is, it's worse than not saying anything at all! 

For Heaven's sake, tell the enemy you're recruiting droves of dudes now without having to give away all the "Hygiene is for Infidels" t-shirts and Mullah Omar keychains. 

Who can seriously believe that any substantial number of Afghans are on their side when news about one measly recruit makes the front page? 

Oh! But he brought his motorcycle!

Baghdad Bob's pronouncements might have been met with derision and laughter by the invaders, but at least he put his heart into it. 

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